As I start my day, I remind myself that I want to build others up. I want to encourage people; I want people to feel good about themselves and what they are doing. However, there are times in my job that I must hold people accountable for missing expectations. So, how do I share that someone has missed the mark while still building them up? This has been a struggle for me since I always want to believe the best of everyone. I want to give people another chance to prove they had a bad day and the error isn't normal for them. Nonetheless, I still have to hand out consequences for the behavior whether they had a bad day or not.
How do I reconcile these conflicting desires? I do my best to be consistent. I try to be upbeat and positive every chance I get. I make a point to say hello or good morning to everyone I see. I make a point to stop and give my full attention to people I am talking to even when I have two places to be and 12 things to do at that exact moment. I make a point to not complain to others. I know everyone is busy, everyone feels overwhelmed, and everyone has their own personal issues to deal with, so what does it help those I interact with to complain? It doesn't, so I don't. I make a point to offer assistance where ever I can, even if it's not really my responsibility. I believe these conscience efforts help me to project a positive persona, so that when I must hand out consequences, I hope people understand I am doing what must be done in response to their behavior and choices.
In addition to building up others, when I do have to apply consequences to actions, I treat the person as I did previous to the conversation about choices and the outcome of that discussion. I continue to speak in a positive manner; I continue to greet people with a smile and courteous discourse; I continue to offer assistance when ever and where ever possible. I know they are not the only ones who have had a bad day, said something or acted in a way they shouldn't. If we were all treated in a manner consistent with our worse day, what an awful place that would be for everyone.
Speak life into others. Make a choice to build people up instead of tearing them down. Does that mean I like everyone - no. I'm human. However, I try very hard for all those I interact with to believe they are my favorite. I will have succeeded in my goal when everyone I work with feels that way. What does it hurt to make people feel good? What does it hurt to choose to express yourself in a positive way instead of a negative one? I think it doesn't hurt; I think it heals.
